The Business of Fear
Confronting your darkest fears is hard. It’s personal. It’s vulnerable. It’s one of those things you can’t really outsource or strategize your way around.
But if you're in business—whether you're freelancing, consulting, launching products, running a local pool cleaning service, or writing code from your apartment—you’ve already proven that you're an action taker. You stepped into something uncertain. You made a move most people avoid.
And with that kind of drive, I’ve found there's usually something underneath: an inner spark. A hunger to create. A refusal to settle.
But with that drive comes a shadow. A lot of us have high-performance DNA—meaning we tend to push ourselves hard, set big goals, and hold ourselves to almost impossible standards. We want to be great. We want to do meaningful work. But the flip side of that ambition is often self-criticism, self-doubt, and a sneaky kind of shame we don’t always know how to name.
And when that fear doesn’t get addressed, it hides out in our business.
It shows up as procrastination—putting off that product, that launch, that social media post.
It shows up as perfectionism—editing things to death and still never shipping them.
It shows up as comparison—watching everyone else do what we say we want to do.
It shows up as silence—staying invisible because visibility feels vulnerable.
But behind every one of those patterns, there’s usually a deeper fear.
What will people think?
What if I’m not good enough?
What if I succeed—and then can’t handle it?
What if I fall apart once I get there?
That last one—fear of success—is a tricky one. For me, it's often felt like a fear of myself.
Am I strong enough to carry that responsibility?
Am I mature enough?
Am I worthy of the kind of life I say I want?
These are questions I wrestle with all the time. Seriously—all the time. Some days, the fear is loud. Some days it’s quiet. And some days, it disappears for a while. But it always comes back in some form, usually when I’m about to grow or do something new.
And I’ve learned: the only way to deal with it is to look it in the eye.
Not run from it.
Not outwork it.
Not pretend it isn’t there.
You’ve got to name it. Call it out. Put a spotlight on it.
Here’s what that looks like for me:
I write it down.
I journal things like:
“I’m scared I’m not good enough.”
“I’m scared I can’t handle success.”
“I’m scared of failing.”
“I’m scared because I’ve never done this before.”
And I say them out loud to myself in the mirror. Not as some cheesy affirmation ritual—but just to own it. Because when you name the fear, it gets smaller. It becomes something you can move toward instead of run from.
You realize: these fears aren’t monsters. They’re just signals. Indicators of the edge you’re standing on. Clues about where the next level of your leadership is asking to emerge.
That’s how you become the grounded, centered version of yourself you keep envisioning. Not by avoiding fear—but by walking straight into it.
For me, the tools that help me through it are simple but powerful:
Journaling: Write it out. Get it out of your head.
Prayer: I talk to God. Sometimes I just sit in silence for 20 minutes. That space changes everything.
Nervous system work: Breathwork, cold showers, sauna sessions, exercise, yoga—all of it helps regulate my system and bring me back into my body.
Sometimes success is just doing the thing you were scared to do.
So if you’ve been avoiding that post…
Or delaying that product…
Or hesitating to share your offer…
Just take one action. One small thing. And then honor it.
Celebrate that you walked into the fear instead of running from it.
That’s success.
That’s leadership.
That’s knowing yourself.
And that version of you? That’s who builds the life you’re really after.